When Bars and Clubs Become TOO Exclusive

As you may have noticed, there was an absence in my usual Thursday post. As much as I love writing this blog, I have become increasingly busy here in Korea (Someone is getting popular!). I think it would be slightly absurd for me to prioritize writing about my life in Korea over living my life in Korea. So, in an attempt to maximize my Korean exploration (and to work on some short stories) I’ll be returning to posting once a week on Sundays…at least for now.

Man Bar:

So…can I go in or not?

As a guy who comes from around the Los Angeles area of California (aka Orange County), I am pretty accustomed to the ridiculous tricks bars use to get business. Ladies nights, where girls drink for less, usually have a pretty strong pull on the fairer sex…and if that doesn’t work they can always make it an 80s night (which is like cat-nip for lady-boozers). Putting up huge ropes to form long, completely unnecessary lines is another good trick to get people asking questions, “If it is this popular on the outside, how amazing is the inside?” However, Korea definitely takes the “most exclusive bar” award with this trick. Of course the sign says “Man Bar,” but don’t let that fool you, because no men are actually allowed in there. Oh, your group of ladies wants to have a girlie-drink, dance-night at “Man Bar?” Well, too bad. Only one of you are allowed inside at a time. Read the sign, does that look plural to you? Didn’t think so. I’m not sure what goes on in there, but I’m pretty sure that the one lady in there has a 0% chance of getting grinded on by creepy dudes or rufied. I don’t care how hot she is, she isn’t going home with anyone tonight.

Adventures in Konglish:

“Star is bling bling. Wonderful. In the sky.”

When the assignment is to write five things you would like to learn about concerning astronomy, but instead you write your teacher a tear-jerking hip-hop ballad…you still get full points. Dear Kanye, watch out, Korean children are writing better lyrics than you.

Someone gun’na die

Although I did have to talk with the student about how you can’t actually “do die” and that maybe writing all about death on your homework can be misinterpreted, I think overall he got the jist of the homework down…now I just have to make sure to keep this kid very happy by bringing him candy, stickers, and high fives. Number 9 is definitely the best…”Please sir, if it is alright with you…I mean, I was just wondering…if it’s not too much to ask, may I die?” “Yes, you may die.”

Signed,

A guy who wishes he could go to the Man Bar…who also writes a blog.

Jordan

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About Jordan Carver

I just love life, experiencing it all, and it is definitely better with more people participating. Whether it's surfing, rock climbing, or exploring the forests, it's always better to share the magic.

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